Episode 32: [GUEST] How You Can Be More Productive and Embrace Your ADHD with Ian Tenenbaum

In this episode, Stephanie talks with ADHD Productivity expert, Ian Tenenbaum, about how to be more productive and embrace your ADHD. If you've felt overwhelmed and haven't been sure how to get started, this is an episode you don't want to miss. While the conversation centers around those with ADHD, there's something here for everyone, especially writers, who come to the blank page and are not sure what to do next. 

Who is Ian Tenenbaum?

Ian has over 20 years of expertise in startups, led two companies to the Inc 500 and secured deals with Fortune 500 brands. Despite grappling with ADHD's challenges, he channeled immense energy into his ventures. Now, he's dedicated to building Accountable, a coaching platform for high performers with ADHD to realize their visions and reduce overwhelm.

How can you connect with Ian Tenenbaum?

https://www.linkedin.com/in/iantenenbaum

https://www.instagram.com/accountable.live

If you'd like to connect with the Inspired Writer Collective: 

Subscribe to our Newsletter: https://inspired-writer-collective.ck.page/24be00b363

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Transcript

0:01

Welcome fellow writers to the Inspired Writer Collective podcast, your go to hub for all things writing. We're your hosts, Elizabeth and Stephanie. Whether you're a seasoned wordsmith or just dipping your quill into the ink well of creativity, we're absolutely thrilled to have you with us. Drawing from our experience in publishing diverse writing genres and the daily grind of showing up for yourself, we're here to be your writing companions. Expect insightful discussions, expert tips, and a dash of inspiration as we navigate the twists and turns of the writing journey together. So whether you're listening on your commute, during your writing session, or just relaxing at home, get ready for an immersive experience that celebrates the art and joy of writing. Hi,

Stephanie: 0:51

Hello listeners, get ready for an informative episode today as I welcome Ian Tenenbaum to the podcast to share with us his perspective on ADHD and productivity and the work that he does. And especially for those of us as writers who are maybe feeling that we're, we have some ADHD tendencies or possibly undiagnosed, or maybe you are diagnosed and wanting to learn more about how you can navigate your ADHD and your everyday writing schedule. So welcome Ian.

Ian Tenenbaum: 1:31

Thanks. I'm glad to be here.

Stephanie: 1:35

Yeah. So tell us a little bit about some of the strategies that maybe for those of us who are feeling overwhelmed. in our daily lives and trying to figure out how to get started writing, you know, things that are getting in the way. How can we get past those feelings of overwhelm and get to the work that we want to be doing?

Ian Tenenbaum: 1:59

Yeah, it's a great question. So I think, I, I'm not a writer in the sense personally as my career, but I do do a lot of creative work, like writing for social media or, you know, together workshops. So, know, I, I know all too well that feeling of, know,

Stephanie: 2:21

Okay. Okay. Okay.

Ian Tenenbaum: 2:45

we want to do so many different ideas It kind of clogs the system. I, with my clients love the analogy of kids leaving a classroom for lunch. And if all the kids rushed to the door at the same time, no one's getting out the door and no one's getting a lunch. Right. So

Stephanie: 3:03

Silence. Silence. Silence.

Ian Tenenbaum: 3:22

scared now They're hungry. just builds builds builds builds builds and have to do is kind of train ourselves And these you know the kids in our mind That even the

Stephanie: 3:33

Okay.

Ian Tenenbaum: 3:33

kid at the end of the line is still going to get to lunch They're still going to eat there's going to be plenty of food But if they don't line up in order and slow down and go one at a time, no one's getting out. Right. the way this looks for us a lot is practicing these self regulation skills that it all starts

Stephanie: 3:53

Okay.

Ian Tenenbaum: 4:11

to

Stephanie: 4:12

Okay.

Ian Tenenbaum: 4:12

then work on it. Right? So imagine it's a switch You know, you're either not working on it or you are right and getting that switch to flip can be very hard, Or getting the kids out of the classroom is very hard, right? Everything gets stuck

Stephanie: 4:26

Yep.

Ian Tenenbaum: 4:26

first thing we need to do is really like calm ourselves down And then I developed in my coaching kind of practice an operating system that helps us go through the process from having all these ideas and overwhelm to slowly calming ourselves down. the, the best thing I recommend starting with is getting things out of our head. So. Even though we're not necessarily starting writing the project or writing the work or writing my post, I can do is grab a pen and paper and just start writing down all the ideas are kind of clogging me. And that combined with self regulation starts to calm us down. And then when we see something outside of our brain on paper, can start going to step two, which is organize things a bit, right? So I want to do this. I want to do that. I want to do this. I have this idea.

Stephanie: 5:34

Shh.

Ian Tenenbaum: 5:36

comment down and then we look at it and then we can see what's the best, where do I want to start? What's the best place to, to kind of pick an entry point. And then from there we can have a lot of that noise quiet, and then we could pick a place to start we can ease into it and I have some other steps, but short answer. Is it all starts with calming our nervous system down and then just gradually finding ways to kind of like You know move into it slowly step by step,

Stephanie: 6:18

Yeah, and it's, and I know that sometimes there are people in writing communities who recommend, you know, taking yourself for a walk if you're, you know, feeling stuck, does, is that also a strategy that helps with calming the nervous system or is it better to start by just letting everything out on paper? Mm hmm.

Ian Tenenbaum: 6:42

Well, yeah, I think you're touching on something that that's interesting So so there could be a few different reasons why we feel stuck. It could be That we are having trouble getting the gears moving. So we We might have no thoughts and we are having a blank, right? it could be, I'm

Stephanie: 7:04

Thank you. You

Ian Tenenbaum: 7:12

like where'd all the kids go? And it's totally

Stephanie: 7:16

Okay. You Mm hmm

Ian Tenenbaum: 7:45

find a lot of calm. By going for a walk and on the walk, they let all those thoughts just kind of marinate. So the short answer is yes, a walk can be fantastic and it could probably serve a couple different depending on the specific Circumstances.

Stephanie: 8:07

And so what are some other steps, you know, let's say you have all the, everything's down on paper and you're starting to organize, but then you're still in a space where you're feeling like you're not sure where to start. That even though you've gotten all, cause I think about, you know, from, For me, I love, you know, free writing and getting everything down, but then sometimes there's still that feeling of, I still am not sure where to start. It still feels like there's a lot going on. What, what would you recommend in that situation for a writer?

Ian Tenenbaum: 8:49

Yeah, so I think one of the best things that I love and it's probably the the most fitting analogy with writers is the idea of repetition and thinking through the lens of everything being a first draft So I use the terminology with my clients first draft and we're

Stephanie: 9:09

for joining us today.

Ian Tenenbaum: 9:24

and the pressure that we put on ourselves. So, so a

Stephanie: 9:27

Okay. Okay.

Ian Tenenbaum: 9:55

need to do is just disrupt that, you know, thought pattern that's getting us stuck

Stephanie: 10:02

Okay.

Ian Tenenbaum: 10:03

and one of the best ways to do it is just really dramatically lower the barrier and say, I'm just going to put it down and I'm just going to start with an outline, which I could then move around I have an outline and I'm ready to start on chapter one. I'm just going to start writing a draft. I don't know what's going to happen. I might throw it out completely, but the biggest thing we're trying to do, whether it's the self regulation, the going for a walk, the getting, we're trying to transition from not doing it to doing it. And it's like, it's. It sounds so simple to a lot of people, but for us with ADHD, it can be the bane of our existence. Like, I don't think a lot of people without ADHD could fully appreciate how difficult it is for us to go from not doing something we want to do to doing the thing we want to do.

Stephanie: 11:06

Bye.

Ian Tenenbaum: 11:06

and that's just one of our big challenges that people don't understand. Well, you know what to do. You said you want to. Just do it. That's like nails on a chalkboard for us with ADHD. Just do it. People say, Oh, well, you know what to do. You know how to do it. Just go do it. We want to like, I guess I don't have any hair. We want to pull our hair out. We're like, it was that easy, don't you think I would be doing it? And the reason

Stephanie: 11:36

sounds so familiar.

Ian Tenenbaum: 11:38

Yeah,

Stephanie: 11:39

No, I was just gonna say that. I mean, that sounds so familiar.

Ian Tenenbaum: 11:43

You were

Stephanie: 11:43

Go ahead. Sorry. No, I was just going to say that that sounds so familiar to me.

Ian Tenenbaum: 11:50

yeah, it's frustrating because we're often highly intelligent very smart It and people just can't understand you know how to do something You clearly could do it. Well, you've done it. Well And then you're now struggling to do it. It, it's like something doesn't make sense in their mind. And, and they just start creating stories of it must be because you don't want to, it must be because you're lazy, it must be because You're procrastinating. It must be because, but, and, and they don't, and this is why I like the work I'm doing, and it's bringing attention and light to the fact that it's, it's more difficult for us to do these things than for other people. And it is really it's pervasive and it's, and it's, and it's perpetual and it's frustrating. luckily with the work with, I do with my clients and for myself, I. know that over time by practicing muscles and skills that we never learned, we can improve these things. But it's still something I still struggle with on a weekly basis in a lot of ways and have to keep working on it, working on it more than I think a lot of other people do.

Stephanie: 13:14

Do you find that you have to kind of give yourself a daily mantra of some kind or little reminders to say like, I know, you know, these are the steps to take or, you know, do you have post its up that say, okay, if this happens, like, I These are steps for me to take kind of visuals to remind yourself that, that you, you can get there, but you just have to remember that you have to slow down and take yourself through a few steps.

Ian Tenenbaum: 13:46

one of the, One of the big steps in my productivity system is is making things visual so I have a whiteboard here and one of the things is intuition and it says trust yourself because We question ourselves Daily to a point that's definitely counterproductive. Should I should I should I should I is it? And we don't trust ourselves. Other people say, you know what to do. And it's like, I know, but and then we start getting into storytelling. Right. Another one says, stay the course. So I want to change. I want to do something different. And it's a reminder. Keep doing what you're doing. And then another one is

Stephanie: 14:30

Silence.

Ian Tenenbaum: 14:46

to do something different, questioning myself. and in the house, I have, um, another whiteboard that says small steps build up over time and it's. By the kitchen. And I write little quotes like that. So a huge part of what works well for us. And what we need to be doing is is finding ways to Keep reinforcing these positive mantras and messages that override the lifetime of messages that are running on auto.

Stephanie: 15:21

And do you find it's helpful in the writing work that you do to, you know, to share with people right away that, you know, about, you know, ADHD and ways that, you know, you're navigating it, or, I mean, what are some common things that you see with your clients of, you know, what they struggle with the most when it comes to getting something done?

Ian Tenenbaum: 15:49

Yeah, I mean the, the questioning ourselves is a huge one. you know, we go through life often oscillating between. being impulsive or being stuck in analysis and paralysis and procrastination. And there's this interesting paradox where we have trouble modulating the, the middle ground. So we're either all in hyper focused,

Stephanie: 16:27

Okay.

Ian Tenenbaum: 16:50

erratic, you know, not really very thoughtful. then that

Stephanie: 16:56

Yeah. very much.

Ian Tenenbaum: 17:18

it, but, but our generation never got this help as kids. So we have to develop these skills and these

Stephanie: 17:25

Okay.

Ian Tenenbaum: 17:26

Emotional regulation and these positive self talk messages, self self compassion. So a lot of our, a lot of my clients struggle tremendously from day one with beating ourselves up and shame. And I know I should, and I always struggled to and I can never, and, and that is almost like a train that has so much momentum and inertia that it's It's moving on its own gradually I think I've been doing this work on myself for like six years, seven years, starting around when I was 37, 38. I'm seeing now a dramatic shift, but it's it's definitely slow moving. So the big thing is learning a little at a time and then implementing and then practicing a little more and then implementing and then Accepting that there isn't some silver bullet. There isn't some new system. There isn't some new You know, app,

Stephanie: 18:36

Okay.

Ian Tenenbaum: 18:36

gonna be some new workbook. There isn't gonna be some new diary. There isn't gonna there. We're always looking for this quick fix. That's gonna solve all our problems.

Stephanie: 18:47

Silence. Silence. Silence. Silence. Silence. All

Ian Tenenbaum: 19:06

right? So, we don't have LASIK for ADHD brain yet. So, these are things that

Stephanie: 19:13

Okay. Huh.

Ian Tenenbaum: 19:28

Okay. I get why. Then we can slowly start building new. and new habits and new skills.

Stephanie: 19:37

Well, I love what you say about using the word embrace and, you know, just, and accepting where you are and creating this understanding around what's going on, because I think about how often You know, the whole idea where people do put themselves down when they think like, Oh, well, it's because I have ADHD. And it, it always is unfortunately put in a negative. And I was a classroom teacher for a long time, so I'm familiar with, you know, all of the negativity that comes along with it, unfortunately, with kids. And so, I mean, it's definitely something that it sounds like with the work you're doing, you're changing that narrative for people, which, and when I think about writers, There's already naturally a sense to want to break yourself down if you're feeling like you're not getting the right words on the page or you're not getting enough words written in a day. And there always seems to be all this pressure. And what I'm hearing from you is this sense of when you come to understand how this impacts you, you can take steps to Change that for yourself and the idea of a practice over time that it's not going to be a quick fix, but when you embrace that aspect of your identity, that it can make big changes for you. So I think that that, I mean, that's, that's really cool to think about. And I know when we talked before we had talked about, you know, when is it ADHD and when is it anxiety? What is the difference there? Cause I know some people feel anxious and maybe they think, you know, in thinking about this, that that's the, Oh no, it's not ADHD, it's anxiety. At what point is there the differentiation between those two? Okay.

Ian Tenenbaum: 21:34

Yeah. So I make it very clear that I'm not a psychiatrist. I'm not a therapist. I'm not a licensed doctor. And everything I share is based on personal experience or things that I've observed or learned from doctors and experts. And my understanding is that there's a lot of, you know, comorbidity between ADHD and anxiety. We, we, there's a lot of overlap. So a lot of us with ADHD will have anxiety. in different ways. They're definitely separate, but there, there's a lot of overlap. And I've found a lot of success working with my own therapist and psychiatrist over years to kind of flush out what are the things I'm struggling with on a daily basis that are a root cause anxiety? What are ADHD? What are things that I could do strategies for? What are things I need therapy for? What are things I need medication Oh, I'm taught. I'm

Stephanie: 22:27

Okay.

Ian Tenenbaum: 22:48

years old, went, you know, finally got diagnosed with ADHD and found out that all these years, a lot of what she was struggling with was actually ADHD related more than the anxiety. And I'm hearing that's common in women more than men A lot of my clients have mentioned it too where they always thought they just had anxiety just had anxiety They always thought their challenges were largely anxiety related and then they found out at

Stephanie: 23:16

Huh. Okay.

Ian Tenenbaum: 23:17

It's ADHD as well again, the short answer is I encourage everyone to be meeting with A therapist, psychiatrist, and trying to understand what's really going on. So that's where you can then start to get the right support when you have a better sense of what's really going on biologically and in the brain.

Stephanie: 23:44

No, that's a, that's a great recommendation for our community. And it's, it's a great idea. It's always good, of course, to get any kind of, you know, professional help that you need. Is there anything else that you would like to share with our audience that maybe we haven't touched upon yet? Silence.

Ian Tenenbaum: 24:19

the loop of having a highly creative mind, come up with so many ideas. And that does cause a lot of anxiety for us. Because trying to sift through this overwhelm of thoughts that does trigger anxiety in us, which is why, you know, a lot of the work I do starts with that self regulation and emotional regulation. So it really comes down to practicing that muscle of calming our nervous system. When I work with clients who have overactive anxiety, that work is very challenging. So then I refer, you know, Hey, go meet with a therapist or a psychiatrist. know, it sounds like there's a higher level of anxiety at play, but, but there, there's a lot of ways they're interconnected. So nothing else I would add. I think anybody who's looking for help or curious, definitely reach out to me. I run a community of highly successful professionals and entrepreneurs with ADHD. I work privately and then also in a group setting and we have a community that's very supportive. So Anyone, who's curious reach out to me and i'd love to talk to you.

Stephanie: 25:38

And where can they, where can they find this information? Where can they find you online?

Ian Tenenbaum: 25:44

So either on linkedin just ian tenenbaum And my website is accountable dot live is called accountable Because we hold each other accountable

Stephanie: 25:59

Well, thank you so much for being with us today, Ian. This was a great conversation and listeners. I hope you enjoy and definitely, you know, check out Ian's resources online and reach out to him if you're interested in connecting and learning more.

26:22

Thank you so much for tuning in to another episode of the Inspired Writer Collective podcast. We hope you found inspiration, insights, and connection to yourself as a writer. If you enjoyed this episode, please share, subscribe, and leave us a five star review. Remember, the power of storytelling lies within each of us, and by supporting one another, we can make a difference. We invite you to schedule a coffee chat with us on our website, www. inspiredwritercollective. com. Just like our style here on the podcast, our coffee chats are casual and a way to connect about your writing and discover if book coaching or joining our upcoming writing cohorts for memoir and contemporary romance writing are for you. You can also become a part of our community by connecting with us on social media. You can find us on Instagram and YouTube at Inspired Writer Collective, on TikTok at Inspired Writer LLC. Let's continue this writing journey together. You can find links in the show notes. Until next time, fellow writers, may your pens be mighty and your stories captivating. Happy writing!